I should’ve listened to my mom – and a little lesson I learned

I have been struggling with my lower-back since last year October, in short my muscles went into spasm and wouldn’t loosen up. I have gone through some drastic measures to get it sorted, including physio, acupuncture, biokinetics and cortisone injections. I didn’t see the spasm for what it really was – my body’s way of saying “hey, hold up, take it easy, slow down”.

I woke up one morning so tired that I would’ve sold my soul to the devil for an extra hour’s sleep. The type of tired that I felt is something that you have no clue about, unless you have been there. Felt it.

I started going through the motions of life, simply because I had to. I had to work, so work I did. I had to study, so study I did (how much I actually took in is debatable). Going out with friends required brushing my hair and getting dressed, a thought far too exhausting so cancelling was easier.

One night when I was driving home a robot turned red, like robots do. The mere thought of a minute’s delay to get home was simply too much, so I bursted into tears. It was at this point that I realised I had burned myself out and carrying on, pushing, was simply no longer an option.

I went to see my soul coach (or, what most people will call, counsellor – though her role in my life far exceeds the way you’d define “counsellor”). It amazes me what you can achieve through constellation work (healing on a soul level). It was during this session that I learned a lesson which I will hold near and dear to my heart for the rest of this life;

Honour your journey, trust the path that you are on. Respect who you are right here and now. There is absolutely no need to rush anything – where you are is perfect. What is meant to be, will be. 

Between all the medical treatments, it was the treating of the soul that did the world of good. I woke up yesterday morning, for the first time in months, feeling like I could conquer the world, instead of hiding from it.

That said, the one “medical” treatment that I did see value in was going to a biokineticist. In my last session she indicated that we’ll be doing some posture work. The one exercise involves pulling back your shoulders, the aim is to straighten your shoulders and, as a result, your back. It was at this point that I realised I wished I had listened to my mom when I was younger, she always told me “skouers terug en rug regop”, which roughly translates to “shoulders back and keep your back straight”. I had to laugh, it turns out that mom does know best. 

The crumpling of New Year’s resolutions

I hate New Year’s resolutions – and hardly ever make them. At some point last year I made a before 2012 end’s resolution, it was quite simple, or so I thought. My year-end resolution was to be able to run 5km. I bought myself running shoes, reflective clothing and a cap. In check was my fully loaded iPod, a Run 5km in 5 Weeks programme and plenty of weeks left to do it in. I was quite looking forward to trotting along the beachside when we went to Durban for Christmas.

What I didn’t bargain on was the illnesses of an *almost* 30-year-old creeping up on me, about 11 months in advance. I have since been told that in your near 30s your back gives in (check), in your 40s your knees and in your 50s your mind. By 60 you don’t care what else goes because it is your mind you miss the most. Back to the resolutions…

As 2013 approached I decided to do the New Year’s resolutions thing. Small, simple and achievable goals (in no particular order);

1. Do my first 5km road run – preferably before Winter.
2. Read more – or at least finish my sparkling new Games of Thrones box set.
3. Spend more time with friends. Last year, due to being a part-time student, some of my favourite people were seriously neglected.
4. Pass seven subjects.
5.  Spend more quality time with bf.

The new year hadn’t even started when my well-intended resolutions started crumbling.

In early January – after a Voltaren injection, two Cortisone injections, chronic medication (or so I was told) and one, still need to happen, neurosurgeon appointment – I realised that my dream to run 5km has to be put on hold. In fact – all training has been put on hold, until such time that I know what is wrong with my lower back and what I can and cannot do (to prevent further injury).

Now the crumpling of resolutions 2 and 3 are as a result of resolution 4. I have registered for four subjects in this semester and, after assessing the workload, I realised that most of my spare time will be dedicated to studying.

In my own stubborn and dedicated way I do try and stick to resolution 2 and 3. I try and read for five minutes every night, normally while brushing teeth (it’s a skill I mastered as a child), and I’ve accounted for special events with friends in my study schedule – my iCal app is by far the most overused app on my devices – everything goes in there.

So far the only resolutions that seem to be doing ok are 4 and 5. To date I have managed to stick to my study schedule. I keep myself going by reminding myself that the faster I complete my subjects and get my BA, the quicker I can get back to this thing called a life. Bf and I are doing our best with this quality business – we now eat at the table and talk instead of in front of the TV. Plus, there are special times in my iCal entitled “Date Night”, in two cases “Date Day”.

I suppose the lesson is this – even the simplest of goals require work. Get off your butt and work on it. It reminds me of why I value reading and am desperate to hit the road; 

"The keys to life are running and reading. When you're running, there's a little person that talks to you and says, "Oh I'm tired. My lung's about to pop. I'm so hurt. There's no way I can possibly continue." You want to quit.

If you learn how to defeat that person when you're running, you will learn not to quit when things get hard in your life.

For reading, there have been gazillions of people that have lived before all of us. There's no new problem you could have – with your parents, with school, with a bully. There's no new problem that someone hasn't already had, and written about it in a book," – Will Smith.  

12 weeks became a lifetime commitment

Today, 12 weeks ago, I embarked on the USN 12-Week Challenge. While there has been some body transformation – no hard work goes unpaid – the most important factor in this journey was the lessons I learned, and the lessons are what I’d like to share.

Lesson 1: Make it a lifestyle change
For 28 years I pretty much ate what I please as a result I picked up a few kilos, some body fat and bad eating habits. Changing this meant changing my lifestyle – a permanent, for life change, forever. Get it? Sorry, but you’ll be surprised how many people fail to understand the concept of ‘lifestyle change’. 

Lesson 2: Eat to be healthy, not thin.
There are two things my mom taught me about diet and exercise. Firstly, there is no such thing as a quick fix, it takes hard work, time and dedication, and secondly, dieting is bad for you.

Having kept in mind that yo-yo dieting is bad for you and this is a lifetime journey, I opted for a low GI diet because it doesn’t cut out any food, instead, it teach you to make the healthier choice. For example, replace potato with sweet potato, choose rye bread over white bread, cut the fat off your meat, opt for the durum wheat pasta and reach for the cinnamon or honey to replace sugar. Portion control is also very important. 

In the 12 weeks the eating has become a habit. There are still a few hic-ups, which will come right with time. Look at the ratio 28 years vs 12 weeks, it takes time. 

Whichever diet you choose, research, research, research! And then ask yourself, can you do it for life? If the answer is yes, then dive in head first. It also helps to go see a nutritionist/dietitian – they are the experts after all.

Lesson 3: Get off your butt and get moving.

In the last four years I’ve gone to gym on and off, more off than on. I now go regularly, something I’ve always wanted to achieve, and I love it.

I love the sweat, the achy-muscles and, especially, the ‘hey, I am stronger’ reaction. There is nothing more satisfying that hitting a spinning class and really pushing it, realising that your intensity level is higher than it was yesterday – and you are still going!  

It is important to know how to do the exercises correctly, have a training programme and know when to make adjustments. You can’t walk blindly into gym and by some small miracle hope to achieve something – walk in with a goal. 

Here you can go either one of two ways – go see a personal trainer or empower yourself to set the training programme and make the adjustments. There are loads of information and advice out there. My favourite is a blog called Gym Rats Sweat and Sacrifice, Fitness Magazine and the USN website. And, obviously, www.google.com. Google is your friend. 

Another benefit is that exercising helps me shift my mind from work to my studies. Sitting down at night has become a little easier because I have the energy.

Lesson 4: Willpower is like a muscle – work it!

Be determined. Put your mind to it and do it! When I feel like I can’t anymore I push for that one extra rep, that one extra minute. In fact, I often put the level up a bit, just to prove to myself that I can.

Lesson 5: Support.
Support is like a push-up bra, it gives you a lift when you need one. My mom, from when I first had the idea, had her pom-poms out, and bf cooks at night and takes care of the kittens so I can hit the gym after work. It’s the small gestures of support that makes any journey easier. Now we get to the two lessons why I decided after 10 weeks to stop using the USN Phedra-Cut and CLA.

Lesson 6: Focus on the task at hand.
I noticed one night during spinning that I clock watch and my focus is on the pile of studying I need to get through, the to-do list on my desk at work and the to-do list of being an adult – bills, washing, deworming tablets for the kittens etc.

During exercising I stress about other stuff rather that focusing on the muscles I am working. As a result I release a stress hormone, which pretty much cancels out the fat burning hormone (at least that was the way it was explained to me). I am working at changing the behaviour by listening to classical music or symphonic metal en route to gym and doing some breathing exercises. Once I manage to succeed in that, hopefully some more body fat will melt away and the muscles, which I know is there, show more.

Stress is an ugly thing, so when you are a gym focus at exercising – de-stress rather than stress more.

Lesson 7: Getting in the zzz’s is important.

There is an old saying, “I’ll sleep when I’m dead”. Yea, your body doesn’t work that way. An adult should be getting seven to eight hours of uninterrupted sleep a day.

My first priority is my BA and as a part-time student there is very little I can do about the lack sleep. But yes, sleep is important to burn the fat, recover the muscles and speed up the metabolism.

So where to from here?

I have adjusted my training programme to include more cardio (hopefully bringing down the body fat more) and I am sticking to my low GI diet and working on those eating behaviour hic-ups. Enough to maintain my weight. My goal, after all, is to complete this semester successfully.

After exams I will be doing the USN 12-Week Challenge again. I will then have more time, be able to focus better and sleep more.

As I said in the beginning, there is no such thing as a quick fix, this is a lifetime journey - and I look forward to another 12 weeks of life changing.  
 

The results:
Kilos dropped: 7.4kg
Body fat lost: 7.65%
Dress size: From an uncomfortable size 34, boarder-line 36, to a very comfy 34.

The (not-so) secret ingredients for change

I have quite the soft spot for cupcakes, Smarties, ice-cream and (more than I should) biltong – anytime of the day or night, and finishing a packet of NikNaks – no problem there either. Like most I knew my lifestyle was not the healthiest and over the years I have tried changing it, each time failing dismally. Until now. 

I am officially halfway into week three of my USN12-Week Challenge. Now I realise that I am still in the ‘easy’ phase, but trust me it hasn’t been challenge free. 

On day seven we were invited to a friend’s birthday – at an Italian restaurant. Not only did I have to say no to delicious looking pizzas and pastas, but I had to avoid the cupcake table too. I had visions of running past the table and diving face first into the cupcakes, and, at one stage, I thought, “one cupcake, surely it can’t make that much of a difference?”. Truth is, it can. One cupcake could’ve set me back those seven days, and that is when I made a conscious decision that I will stick out the 12 weeks – no cheating.

So why did I fail in the past with changing my lifestyle? Simple. I didn’t have goals, the knowledge, a plan of action or a reward system. I believe that these are four vital ingredients to any behavioural change. 

The goals. My goals are not in kilograms or fat percentage, but rather in perception. My goal is to look in the mirror and like what I see. To know that I look the best that I can. 

Also, I have never owned a pair of shorts (and my dresses and skirts are all knee-length). For once in my life I would love to own a pair of cute shorts, which I wear to flaunt it, rather than (boardshorts) to hide it. 

Gain the knowledge. Now here I am quite privileged. Because I work in wellness, I am exposed to things like what is a healthy lifestyle, the healthier choice and what healthy weight loss is. But remember, Google is your friend. If you don’t know then read up about it or ask. (PS: One of my favourite websites is ShapeMag.)

Go and see the dietician or fitness consultant. Spend the money to see a professional and know you are doing it right rather than attempting it on your own. Not finding out the necessary know-how can lead to you not seeing results and giving up. If you are interested in the USN 12-Week Challenge, contact USN for any tips or advice – they are great at getting back to you. 

Have a plan of action. Changing something is like finding your way to a place for the first time, you need directions. I took about two months reading up about low GI food, the USN products and getting together some recipes. Based on my research, I then selected my USN products and drew up a meal plan. I also made sure I knew how to do the exercises properly – to optimise results and ensure that I don’t hurt myself.

The reward system. If you work hard, you deserve a little reward. Once a week I treat myself to some guilt-free dessert. While you can have the USN Protein Dessert every day, I prefer to use it as my reward. I also plan to extend my tattoo once I have reached week six, and to get a decent pair of jeans after the 12 weeks.

To add some sprinkles to the ingredients

A lifestyle change requires commitment – remind yourself why you are making the change, what the benefits are and visualise yourself having reached your goals. 

Dedication – say no to that cupcake. Get up on a Saturday morning and go to gym, run that extra two minutes. 

Motivation – when those last four lunges seem impossible the drill sergeant in my head reminds me that today’s weakness is tomorrow’s strength. And in any case impossible actually is (I'm)possible. 

Cut it out – your taste buds will adjust. Cutting out the sugar out of my coffee was hard. When I started the USN 12-Week Challenge I was still putting in half a teaspoon of sugar. A friend then gave me the advice; cut it out – your taste buds will adjust – and it has.

Support – it helps – a lot! When we were at the Italian restaurant, bf didn’t mention once how nice the pizza was, only when we got home did he say that was the best pizza he has ever had. I appreciate that. It’s the small gestures of support and words of encouragement from bf, my (wine loving) friends and my mom. 

When it comes to a healthy lifestyle, I often hear people say, but I don’t have the time. I don’t think it’s time you need, it is support (think about it), but that is another blog for another time.

Gearing up for THE challenge

I seem to enjoy taking on challenges lately. Early last year I decided to change careers, so I enrolled into Unisa and started my BA in Psychological Counselling. In June I started a new job, in an industry I didn’t even know exists, and in December we moved out of our flat and into a house. Ok, so the last one isn’t quite a challenge, but it was a big change.

As I type this I am mentally preparing myself for my next challenge – the USN 12-Week Challenge.

Bailey Schneider took up the challenge roughly seven weeks ago and I’ve been following her progress. Last week I saw some “slightly older” pictures (before USN) of Bailey, and then some new ones. My jaw dropped and suddenly I had this thought, “hey, maybe I could…”, and so I started stewing over the thought.

Oddly enough Bailey’s slimmer figure is not what inspired me to take up the challenge, it is her attitude towards it that made the difference. Not once did Bailey say she wants to lose 20kg, or look like Heidi Klum (after all the airbrushing) – Bailey’s goal is to be the best version of herself.

For me, therein lies the secret to ensure my success – to be the best version of myself.

 

So instead of obsessing to look as good as what “she” does (referring to women we so blindly idolise) or try and fit into society’s version of perfection, I will embark on the USN 12-Week Challenge to look MY best. For me.

However, before I start this challenge, I first need to complete another – round one of exams, which conveniently ends AFTER the JoburgWine Show.